Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I'm Late! I'm Late! For a CNN/YouTube Republican Debate!

  • 7:35 - Walnuts promises to do everything right and activates the buzz word "pork"
  • 7:36 - Rudy throws out "Ronald Reagan". How many times am I going to hear him and Mitt say "Ronald Fucking Reagan"?
  • 7:38 - Fred Thompson responds to a question about limited government by mumbling some nonsensical bullshit
  • 740 - OMG, Huckabee is totally biting on Ron Paul's schtick!
  • 7:52 - Duncan Hunter has decided to use his international fame and influence to tell everyone to "Buy American". Gee, thanks a lot,Duncan!
  • 7:53 - Fred Thompson doesn't know a motherfucking thing about his own campaign ads
  • 7:54 - Mitt Romney used to think it was okay to kill babies, but now he's not as enthusiastic about it.
  • 7:55 - Fred Thompson is drrrunk. He needs a bump!
  • 8:02 - Rudy quotes statistics. I'm getting sleepy. Oh shit, Rudy just got booed on gun rights! I'm sorry people, if you can't pass a government issued exam then you are a stupid motherfucker and accordingly should have no basic rights (whatsoever!)
  • 8:06 - Mitt Romney answers a question about inner city violence with a response about sexual predators?
  • 8:09 - Mitt Romney has said a lot of things tonight, but I just want to know if he is wearing his Mormon underwear.
  • 8:12 - Oh, Look! It's Fred Thompson stuttering about abortion. What an ogre!
  • 8:15 - Yuckleberry says Jesus would never run for president
  • 8:16 - Tancredo wishes Jesus would have the decency to kill all the goddamned Mexicans
  • 8:17 - Rudy reads the fucking Bible like all the time...because it's allegorical
  • 8:18 - Whoa, back up there, Mitt! Everybody knows that your Mormon "Bible" is not like the real "Bible" Bible
  • 8:19 - Ah Hell, now it's Bible School time here (where's my drink?) with all the unimaginably Christian Republicans (public restrooms not included!)
  • 8:25 - He did it! Rudy is finally getting to fawn over 9/11 and Islamic Terrorism. OMG, he's smiling!
  • 8:29 - Mitt Romney will water board every single fucking one of you if that's what it takes!
  • 8:34 - I guess Fred Thompson will just rant about anything....something about victory over the hip advertising of Islamofascism and high oil prices.
  • 8:40 - Ding! Ding! Ding! Rudy just said "Reagan" and "9/11" in the same sentence. Rudy has now said 9/11 four times in sixty seconds. It's called patriotism, people!
  • 8:42 - Fred Thompson + A question on the power of the Vice-President = Complete redneck gibberish that makes no fucking sense
  • 8:44 - What? Oh, Duncan Hunter does not have a campaign ad! Now CNN is just fucking with everybody...
  • 8:52 - This is a Republican debate, so things are (naturally) getting a little gay. Typical.
  • 9:0? - Yuckleberry just tried to reach out to the black community by calling them all diabetic, HIV+, hypertensive, poor people. Not cool, Yuckleberry! What a dick.
  • 9:08 - Ron Paul has more money and more fans than poor Walnuts....Walnuts sad :'(
  • 9:12 - Oh, I wish this bottle of wine wasn't empty!

    1 comment:

    Crystal Clear said...

    Unfortunately, I watched that thing. It was complete utter incoherent crap. I want those hours of my life back. Also Ron Paul, who to me is the most sensible of the republican candidates, was only allowed to say about 15 words, but at least he said something reasonable. Of course the minute anything reasonable comes out of someones mouth republican must boo. MADNESS! BTW I think Mitt is the worse snake up there! What kind of a person would vote for him?