Thursday, March 12, 2009

Acclaimed Thespian Lashes Out at President Obama



Last night on Sean Hannity's Wacky Variety Hour, Victoria Jackson made her triumphant return to political punditry. She was a picture of radiance in chartreuse suede accessorized with a gigantic magenta poof-thing that was just fucking haphazardly crammed into her lovely blonde up-do.

Mrs. Jackson blurted out so many notable declarations that it's hard to even catalog them all, but I'll give it the old college try anyway:

1. Victoria Jackson was not previously interested in politics, because it's all like "neh-neh-neh" and "neh-neh-neh". What?

2. BARACK OBAMA WANTS TO BE FIDEL CASTRO!!!1!

3. Black churches are really just Marxist Liberation Centers. True.

4. Michael Steele got his job because he's black! (you are not supposed to say that out loud though).

5. Vicky is so fed up with Obama that she marched up and down the Santa Monica Pier with a homemade sign that said "WE DON'T WANT NO SOCIALISM!"

Victoria Jackson is a True Patriot and a Real American, all at the same time. Ladies and gentleman, I think we've just found Sarah Palin's 2012 running mate. In your face, Bobby Jindal!

1 comment:

B said...

But the absolute best part was the promise of Larry the Cable Guy's appearance. I assume he was there to weigh in on foreign policy matters. I mean, it's a news broadcast channel, right?

Fabulous, fabulous, hysterically fabulous site you have here. I laughed my ass off while reading your stuff. A new favorite. T

Take care, B